Here's a list of things that I'm thankful for and that I might take granted on a daily basis. This is a random list... not in any type of order.
Sisters - for letting me do what I need to do, accepting me for who I am, having my back regardless of what has happened in the past
Wife - listening to everything I have to say, being supportive, loving me for who I am
Extended brothers & sisters - I thought about labeling this as friends, but then again people that I actually consider to be 'friends' are so much more to me that I couldn't label them as that... I'm thankful that I have a close knit of extended family that I can rely on, people that will tell me the truth regardless of the consequences
I had this whole list set up in my mind yesterday, but I can't seem to put it in words nor really recall what I wanted to write. I should start keeping a notepad with me and start writing things down.
I wanted to go on this whole spiel about simple things in life that matter, that makes living easier (regardless if you realize it or not). Damn, my mind is going blank! Hold on... a little longer... it's on the tip of my tongue, uh, uh.... (tick, tock)... oh, i... think... i ... got... NOPE! hmmm....................
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Ok, here's the gist of it... People should STOP worrying about what they don't have, or what they want, and START appreciating everything they take for granted. E.g., oxygen, life, a roof over your head, a blanket, shoes, clothes. No matter how little it may seem to you, be grateful for what you have, don't be mad at what life hasn't brought you, but be happy with what its given you. Hopefully I can gather my thoughts and make a better argument about this later on, but for now... accept this as, let's say Part I to this blog.
Oh, I remember I wanted to add my parents... no matter how much they pissed me off or messed up my childhood, I appreciate what they have done and what they are doing now. Thank you for putting my sisters and me first... for making sure we had food in our stomach, clothes on our back, a bed to sleep on, a blanket to warm up in, the list goes on and on. Me about to become a father has made me realize the sacrifices that my parents went through and are still going through for my sake. I would be lucky to have half the aspirations of parenting that my parents had and still have.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
Pros and Cons of Hitting a Brick Wall... Trying to run or hide from the pain
This article is meant to benefit people that has lost their way, or have never found a course in life that they were happy with. Hitting a brick wall, losing or having no motivation can be very beneficial, but only if you take a positive route.
Before I begin on exactly why it can be beneficial, let me explain the darker side to this. Alcohol, drugs, addiction, suicide... basically giving up, and not caring looks and feels so good in the present, due to the fact that it lets you forget about your previous problems. Little do you know that these things are creating more problems in the near future.
Trust me, I've been there and done that. I grew up in a broken family. Ever since the age of 10ish, I knew everything that was going on in the house, literally everything! Instead of being a kid, I had to deal with the hardships that life consisted of. I spent a lot of time hiding all of this from my two younger sisters, thinking that I was doing them a favor. There were constant money struggles, and the fighting between my parents never seemed to go away for too long. By the time I was in high school, I realized that it wasn't a matter of 'if' my parents got separated it was a matter of 'when' they get separated I would do this or that. Ultimately, my parents did separate 3 years after I graduated high school. Even though I knew it was coming, it still hit me pretty hard. My sisters took the worst of it, taking the bulk of it in surprise. It was then that I realized that I should have prepared by sisters for what was inevitable. Soon after I moved out with a couple of friends, choosing to ignore what was going on in my family. During the first year was fun... no worries and a lot of partying. I didn't speak to my father once that year, and I rarely spoke to my mother. But soon after that year my sisters informed me what they were going through and I felt sick that I left the burden on them. At first I tried to fix or better our family situation, but it seemed that everything that I did wasn't good enough. On top of that, I didn't feel that I accomplished anything nor was where I wanted to be in life. That's when I resorted to drugs and alcohol. I tried to forget about my troubles by indulging in alcohol and drugs... anything that would free me of the pain. After all was said and done, I realized that the pain that I was trying to forget about was only hidden under all the drugs and alcohol (much like sweeping dirt under the rug metaphor). During that period I calculated that I spent approximately, if not more, 30k on drugs and alcohol. Little good did that do, it just made me more in debt and messed up my internal organs. I have never missed a day of school or work due to the fact that I was sick, but I saw myself getting sicker more often. Also, I got the great gift of liver disease. If that wasn't bad enough, I turned into someone that I just didn't like. My attitude and actions towards some people was inexcusable.
After I got diagnosed with liver disease I realized I needed to do something. The benefit of hitting rock bottom is that you have no where else to go but up. If you can survive the worst of it then you'll be more prepared for everything in the future. It hasn't been an easy course moving up, I still have my fair share of godforsaken days, and I'm just starting on my journey. The light that shines at the end of the road is what is driving me to become better. Not just for me but also for everyone around me.
If you want something but don't know what it is, just keep looking and trying. You'll find it one day.
Before I begin on exactly why it can be beneficial, let me explain the darker side to this. Alcohol, drugs, addiction, suicide... basically giving up, and not caring looks and feels so good in the present, due to the fact that it lets you forget about your previous problems. Little do you know that these things are creating more problems in the near future.
Trust me, I've been there and done that. I grew up in a broken family. Ever since the age of 10ish, I knew everything that was going on in the house, literally everything! Instead of being a kid, I had to deal with the hardships that life consisted of. I spent a lot of time hiding all of this from my two younger sisters, thinking that I was doing them a favor. There were constant money struggles, and the fighting between my parents never seemed to go away for too long. By the time I was in high school, I realized that it wasn't a matter of 'if' my parents got separated it was a matter of 'when' they get separated I would do this or that. Ultimately, my parents did separate 3 years after I graduated high school. Even though I knew it was coming, it still hit me pretty hard. My sisters took the worst of it, taking the bulk of it in surprise. It was then that I realized that I should have prepared by sisters for what was inevitable. Soon after I moved out with a couple of friends, choosing to ignore what was going on in my family. During the first year was fun... no worries and a lot of partying. I didn't speak to my father once that year, and I rarely spoke to my mother. But soon after that year my sisters informed me what they were going through and I felt sick that I left the burden on them. At first I tried to fix or better our family situation, but it seemed that everything that I did wasn't good enough. On top of that, I didn't feel that I accomplished anything nor was where I wanted to be in life. That's when I resorted to drugs and alcohol. I tried to forget about my troubles by indulging in alcohol and drugs... anything that would free me of the pain. After all was said and done, I realized that the pain that I was trying to forget about was only hidden under all the drugs and alcohol (much like sweeping dirt under the rug metaphor). During that period I calculated that I spent approximately, if not more, 30k on drugs and alcohol. Little good did that do, it just made me more in debt and messed up my internal organs. I have never missed a day of school or work due to the fact that I was sick, but I saw myself getting sicker more often. Also, I got the great gift of liver disease. If that wasn't bad enough, I turned into someone that I just didn't like. My attitude and actions towards some people was inexcusable.
After I got diagnosed with liver disease I realized I needed to do something. The benefit of hitting rock bottom is that you have no where else to go but up. If you can survive the worst of it then you'll be more prepared for everything in the future. It hasn't been an easy course moving up, I still have my fair share of godforsaken days, and I'm just starting on my journey. The light that shines at the end of the road is what is driving me to become better. Not just for me but also for everyone around me.
If you want something but don't know what it is, just keep looking and trying. You'll find it one day.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Olivia Wilde
I first noticed Olivia Wilde on the show 'House'. At first I didn't know what to think of her but slowly I started to appreciate her beauty. She's not a drop dead gorgeous type of girl. Nor is she the classic 'head turner', though she can dress to impress at times (such as the first photo above). There's something about this girl that's very alluring and exotic. I just can't seem to pinpoint where it comes from. I'm thinking that its something about the eyes. Nonetheless, I think she should be the next upcoming star... more so than Megan Fox.BTW... rumor has it that Megan Fox became a bit** after after co-starring in 'Transformers.' She let the fame get to her head. Actors and/or actresses that don't treat the fans with open arms should be banished from acting. This should be the way it is, cause the fans are the ones paying their f---in salary!
Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs - Movie Review
The last animation that I saw was UP by Disney and Pixar. I really enjoyed UP. Good storyline, entertaining, and the graphics was on par.
Now, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, is another story. The movie is exactly about what the title says.
To sum it up: Some inventor kid, Flint Lockwood, grows up to make a machine that makes food from water. Somehow the machine gets lodged up in the clouds and rains down food. But the machine gets overworked and goes haywire causing massive food storms that starts wrecking the world. Flint then saves the day by basically killing the machine.
Animation: 9 of 10
Storyline: 6 of 10
I would recommend just waiting for this movie on DVD if you would like to watch it.
My review section isn't very detailed due to the fact I don't want to give away the movie.
Now, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, is another story. The movie is exactly about what the title says.
To sum it up: Some inventor kid, Flint Lockwood, grows up to make a machine that makes food from water. Somehow the machine gets lodged up in the clouds and rains down food. But the machine gets overworked and goes haywire causing massive food storms that starts wrecking the world. Flint then saves the day by basically killing the machine.
Animation: 9 of 10
Storyline: 6 of 10
I would recommend just waiting for this movie on DVD if you would like to watch it.
My review section isn't very detailed due to the fact I don't want to give away the movie.
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra - Movie Review
I finally got to watch GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra, FINALLY! At first I didn't mind waiting to watch it until it got to DVD, b/c it only got OK reviews. But after watching the trailers and commercials for this film, I decided that I wanted to make the judgment for myself.
First off, the movie doesn't seem to follow the original storyline that I remember, but it didn't stop it from being a good movie. The storyline was interesting. It's about how Cobra became to be, and who the GI Joes are. There was a few surprises here and there, and there wasn't any slow parts from what I recall. The movie had enough action to keep me entertained, but not overloaded to the point where it was overwhelming.
The one thing that disappointed me about the movie was that they killed off the korean guy. Byung-hun Lee played Storm Shadow, and from what I remember about the cartoons is that Storm Shadow wasn't a side character.
Storyline: 8 of 10
Action: 8 of 10
First off, the movie doesn't seem to follow the original storyline that I remember, but it didn't stop it from being a good movie. The storyline was interesting. It's about how Cobra became to be, and who the GI Joes are. There was a few surprises here and there, and there wasn't any slow parts from what I recall. The movie had enough action to keep me entertained, but not overloaded to the point where it was overwhelming.
The one thing that disappointed me about the movie was that they killed off the korean guy. Byung-hun Lee played Storm Shadow, and from what I remember about the cartoons is that Storm Shadow wasn't a side character.
Storyline: 8 of 10
Action: 8 of 10
Bulimia, eating-disorder, messed up internal organs or just in my head?
I have this uncontrollable need to throw-up what I ate at random times. Sometimes I can keep it in, and other times it comes out just by me simply burping.
Bulimia is describes as an illness in which a person binges on food or has regular episodes of significant overeating and feels a loss of control. The affected person then uses various methods -- such as vomiting or laxative abuse -- to prevent weight gain. Whereas, an eating disorder is a condition which affects an individuals eating habits, either as a result of their own doing (self-inflicted), or as a bodily reaction to the consumption of food. Eating disorders can range from mild mental anguish to life-threatening conditions, and can affect every aspect of an individuals daily life.
Bulimia sounds like what I have, but then again why do I throw up simply by burping? And why this is occur whether or not I had too much to eat? So its probably not what I have, but at times I wonder if I do.
Now, a eating disorder sounds exactly like what I have, but what kind?
Bulimia is describes as an illness in which a person binges on food or has regular episodes of significant overeating and feels a loss of control. The affected person then uses various methods -- such as vomiting or laxative abuse -- to prevent weight gain. Whereas, an eating disorder is a condition which affects an individuals eating habits, either as a result of their own doing (self-inflicted), or as a bodily reaction to the consumption of food. Eating disorders can range from mild mental anguish to life-threatening conditions, and can affect every aspect of an individuals daily life.
Bulimia sounds like what I have, but then again why do I throw up simply by burping? And why this is occur whether or not I had too much to eat? So its probably not what I have, but at times I wonder if I do.
Now, a eating disorder sounds exactly like what I have, but what kind?
Friday, September 18, 2009
Don't Judge a Book by its Cover
So today, I rode my bicycle to the post office then to the gym and then back home. But after the post office, as I was on my way to the gym... I had a run-in with the police.
On my way to the post office from home, I noticed all these high school kids running... I assumed it was for track and field or cross country (since it was after school hours). I wanted to pass them on the sidewalk but they were all crowding the sidewalk (and there was no bicycle lane on the street). So I slowly followed behind them until I got a chance to pass them. I went to the post office, mailed off what I needed to mail off then headed for the gym. While I was heading for the gym, there was two high school girls running in front of me. Again, there was no bicycle lane and they were crowding the sidewalk, so I waited until I had a chance to pass them. But while I waited to pass them a police car was slowly tailing me. Once I passed the girls, the cop pulled right in front of me and started questioning me. Here's how it went...
Police: "Pull over. Do you have any weapons on you?"
Me: "What?"
Police: "Do you have any weapons on you?"
Me: "Uh, no."
Police starts frisking me and then asks... "What's that in your pocket?"
Me: "Cigarettes."
Police, kindof skeptical and rude: "You're riding a bike and smoking?"
I just look at him kind of dumbfounded cause the last time I checked it wasn't illegal to do that. The police just moves on what his next question.
Police: "What's in your backpack? Where are you headed?"
Me: "Water, towel. I'm headed to the gym."
Police: "What gym?"
Me: "24 hour fitness on so and so street."
Police: "Why were you riding up and down these streets? I just saw you riding on the other way, and now your headed in the opposite direction."
Me: "What? I haven't rode on this street today. I was at the post office. I have a receipt to prove that I was there."
Police looks dumbfounded and starts checking my backpack. Then asks a stupid question...
"What were you doing at the post office?"
Again, I look at him like 'WTF kindof question is that?'
The police simply states the obvious, "Were you mailing something?"
Me: "Uh, yeah." Still looking at him like WTF?
Police: "Sorry theres been a lot of wierdos following girls around here."
The whole time I was just shocked and in awe of what was happening. I couldn't stop laughing on my way to the gym cause of the stupid remarks that policeman made.
And my wife couldn't believe that happened to me out of all the people, cause I find it disgusting looking at any minor in that kind of way.
On my way to the post office from home, I noticed all these high school kids running... I assumed it was for track and field or cross country (since it was after school hours). I wanted to pass them on the sidewalk but they were all crowding the sidewalk (and there was no bicycle lane on the street). So I slowly followed behind them until I got a chance to pass them. I went to the post office, mailed off what I needed to mail off then headed for the gym. While I was heading for the gym, there was two high school girls running in front of me. Again, there was no bicycle lane and they were crowding the sidewalk, so I waited until I had a chance to pass them. But while I waited to pass them a police car was slowly tailing me. Once I passed the girls, the cop pulled right in front of me and started questioning me. Here's how it went...
Police: "Pull over. Do you have any weapons on you?"
Me: "What?"
Police: "Do you have any weapons on you?"
Me: "Uh, no."
Police starts frisking me and then asks... "What's that in your pocket?"
Me: "Cigarettes."
Police, kindof skeptical and rude: "You're riding a bike and smoking?"
I just look at him kind of dumbfounded cause the last time I checked it wasn't illegal to do that. The police just moves on what his next question.
Police: "What's in your backpack? Where are you headed?"
Me: "Water, towel. I'm headed to the gym."
Police: "What gym?"
Me: "24 hour fitness on so and so street."
Police: "Why were you riding up and down these streets? I just saw you riding on the other way, and now your headed in the opposite direction."
Me: "What? I haven't rode on this street today. I was at the post office. I have a receipt to prove that I was there."
Police looks dumbfounded and starts checking my backpack. Then asks a stupid question...
"What were you doing at the post office?"
Again, I look at him like 'WTF kindof question is that?'
The police simply states the obvious, "Were you mailing something?"
Me: "Uh, yeah." Still looking at him like WTF?
Police: "Sorry theres been a lot of wierdos following girls around here."
The whole time I was just shocked and in awe of what was happening. I couldn't stop laughing on my way to the gym cause of the stupid remarks that policeman made.
And my wife couldn't believe that happened to me out of all the people, cause I find it disgusting looking at any minor in that kind of way.
Surgery on Myself
Let me start off with what I did yesterday and earlier this week... there's a back story to it so bare with me.
A few months ago I got into a car accident that broke my nose and fractured a part of my skull (around the upper right part of my forehead). I also had lacerations (cuts) above my right eye, nose, and below my lower lip. This all required more than 30 stitches. Above all else, I had glass embedded into my face because the side window basically shattered directly onto, well, my face.
After everything started to heal and around the time I needed to go back to remove the stitches, I decided that I didn't want to spend money having somebody remove the stitches when I could easily do it myself (so I thought). I thought I got all the stitches but a couple weeks later I found out that I missed one above my eye. The stitch looked like a blood clot, or dried blood. By then my wounds basically closed so I had to make another incision (cut) to get to the stitch. While I got the stitch out, I found a piece of glass that was still stuck in face, so I removed that also.
Now, back to earlier this week. I had two spots on my nose that looked like blood clots, so I assumed it was two stitches that I missed. I made some incisions and tried looking for the stitches but couldn't find any. But once I started probing deeper, I realized it was a piece of glass causing the blood clots. So it took two days, an hour each day, to remove two pieces of glass from my nose. One of the pieces of glass was huge! At least a millimeter by millimeter by 1/2 millimeter.
This blog isn't meant to give you some type of inspiration to do surgery on yourself. And you can thank Nintendo DS - Trauma Center: Under the Knife, for the medical lingo.
A few months ago I got into a car accident that broke my nose and fractured a part of my skull (around the upper right part of my forehead). I also had lacerations (cuts) above my right eye, nose, and below my lower lip. This all required more than 30 stitches. Above all else, I had glass embedded into my face because the side window basically shattered directly onto, well, my face.
After everything started to heal and around the time I needed to go back to remove the stitches, I decided that I didn't want to spend money having somebody remove the stitches when I could easily do it myself (so I thought). I thought I got all the stitches but a couple weeks later I found out that I missed one above my eye. The stitch looked like a blood clot, or dried blood. By then my wounds basically closed so I had to make another incision (cut) to get to the stitch. While I got the stitch out, I found a piece of glass that was still stuck in face, so I removed that also.
Now, back to earlier this week. I had two spots on my nose that looked like blood clots, so I assumed it was two stitches that I missed. I made some incisions and tried looking for the stitches but couldn't find any. But once I started probing deeper, I realized it was a piece of glass causing the blood clots. So it took two days, an hour each day, to remove two pieces of glass from my nose. One of the pieces of glass was huge! At least a millimeter by millimeter by 1/2 millimeter.
This blog isn't meant to give you some type of inspiration to do surgery on yourself. And you can thank Nintendo DS - Trauma Center: Under the Knife, for the medical lingo.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Another Uneventful Day
On a day by day basis, even on a weekly, or monthly basis... things are irritatingly, painfully, agonizingly very repetitive. Now if you like repetition and know what you're doing on a daily, weekly, monthly, yearly basis then more power to you. But, I am not one of those people! I hate having a set schedule and knowing what my day will consist of. I just loathe it! I like randomness!
So today, I mixed it up a little bit. Not so much that it made too much of a difference, but enough to say that I have a unique day. I went to the gym at 4, worked out for 2 hours, then came home, then another 2 hours later I was back at the gym with my significant other. No, I am not addicted to the gym, just thought I'd mix it up a bit.
So today, I mixed it up a little bit. Not so much that it made too much of a difference, but enough to say that I have a unique day. I went to the gym at 4, worked out for 2 hours, then came home, then another 2 hours later I was back at the gym with my significant other. No, I am not addicted to the gym, just thought I'd mix it up a bit.
Sleepness nights...
Its one of those nights again. It's 2:45am and I'm oh so tired (I'm always tired)... but I never seem to be sleepy.
So, as I'm playing a poker SNG (that's Sit and Go tournament for those non-poker players), I happen to come across some sites that will pay you to blog. It's mostly for reviewing there product or service then blogging about it. I thought they would provide an area for me to blog but it so happens that after you register with these sites, they require you to provide them with a link to your own blog site. So here I am, in my late 20s, writing a blog for the first time in my life.
So, as I'm playing a poker SNG (that's Sit and Go tournament for those non-poker players), I happen to come across some sites that will pay you to blog. It's mostly for reviewing there product or service then blogging about it. I thought they would provide an area for me to blog but it so happens that after you register with these sites, they require you to provide them with a link to your own blog site. So here I am, in my late 20s, writing a blog for the first time in my life.
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